Renunciation is the 3rd Parami or Perfection of an Awakened Being. When we discover that a key aspect of the spiritual path is renunciation, it sounds to the worldly mind like deprivation. We can feel that renunciation means giving up everything we love; depriving ourselves of everything pleasant and enjoyable in life. This is understandable, for this is really the only way that the worldly mind can conceive of letting go. But renunciation is actually an attitude, a way of approaching life, that boils down to giving up the mentally fabricated condition that for us to be happy or fulfilled, experience must have a particular (i.e. pleasant) quality. Instead, our energy can be directed to understanding experience itself, however it is. We can see our life as an opportunity to know that whatever comes to us is Dhamma, whatever its particular form or flavor.

Then, we see that renunciation is not a matter of doing, creating, or getting rid of anything. It is moving towards non-contentiousness, rest and ease—not having to manipulate, control, evade, suppress or maneuver experience any more. What a relief to give up that struggle!

We are still engaged in the conventional level of reality– society, justice, identities, mother and father, livelihood and the marketplace. However, if we grasp and expect them to offer complete fulfillment, inevitably we will be disappointed. Is this not true of your own experience?

Renunciation can seem like passivity, a “door mat” philosophy, but it is the opposite. The ability to respond wisely, appropriately and compassionately to life–naturally arises in the non-attached and consequently clear mind. Wholehearted activity and letting go harmoniously co-exist.