What does it mean to say “not self?” I often hear the confusion of this penetrating teaching of the Buddha, ubiquitously described as the most transcendent and transformative aspect of his teaching.

For me, it is not an abstract idea that I try to understand so that I can believe it. Rather, it’s a moment to moment archaeological dig into my own experience to see if I can embody this precious teaching. What I find, when the mind is still, clear and quiet, is first that when I look for “me,” I can’t find any such thing. Rather, present to my physical experience, I feel constantly changing sensations of vibration, temperature, pressure, hardness, softness, flow. These sensations, indicate the aliveness of this body. In stillness, I see clearly that these sensations are shifting and changing all the time. Similarly, knowing mental and emotional experiences, I notice they too are constantly shifting and changing. These physical, mental and emotional experiences also are not in my total control. They appear to arise adventitiously, as a result of causes and conditions in my external and internal environments.

If this is to inform our life, we see that we are not a fixed, solid identity, but rather a collection of changing, shifting experiences to which we can appropriately respond in this very moment, not with fixed ideas of how things should be or of who we are, but with clarity of how they actually are. We are free to respond with what is needed rather than with idealistic ideas of who we are or how we “should” be.

It is important to train the heart to default to love. Working on undoing racism, I am increasingly aware both in my own heart and in my beloved culture, that aversion in our hearts may not lessen if we are unwilling to acknowledge it. Much suffering comes from our unwillingness to look at how conditioning has shaped our attitudes, beliefs and actions.

Krishnamurti said it so well: “It is easy to hate, and hate brings people together after a fashion; it creates all kinds of fantasies, it brings about various types of co-operation, as in war. But love is much more difficult…. You cannot learn how to love, but you can observe hate and put it gently aside. Don’t battle against hate … but see hate for what it is and let it drop away… What is important is not to let hate take root in your mind…. Your mind is like rich soil, and if given sufficient time any problem that comes along takes root like a weed … but if you do not give the problem time to take root, it has no place to grow and it will wither away. If you encourage hate, give it time to take root, to grow, to mature, it becomes an enormous problem. But if each time hate arises you let it go by, then you will find that your mind becomes very sensitive without being sentimental; therefore it will know love.”

We can train the heart to respond in love. It takes practice.

Annually at this time we pause to reflect and renew our determination to eliminate, or at least weaken, unskillful habits and to cultivate, develop and strengthen skillful ones. We call them “resolutions,” yet, because we are not permanent, unyielding or unchanging beings, nor are our circumstances ever permanent, perhaps they can be better seen as moment to moment shifting and changing responses, grounded in wise intentions. Our best possible resolution is to undertake a vigilant and compassionate practice of mindfulness, examining in every moment the intentions that drive our thoughts, acts and speech; to establish and act from those that are wholesome and refrain from acting from those that are unwholesome.

According to Buddhist teaching, every mind moment involves an intention. This suggests the profound subtlety with which choice operates in our lives. Intentions are present in physical movements, in decisions on where to direct attention, which thoughts to pursue or drop, which words to speak. The accumulation of these frequently unnoticed choices shapes our lives.

Long after a deed is done or a word said, its trace or momentum conditions happiness or unhappiness. If we nurture intentions of greed or hate, their inherent suffering will sprout, presently as we act on them and in the future in the form of reinforced habits, tensions and painful memories. Nourishing intentions of love, compassion and generosity, the happiness and openness of those states will become our constant companions. Can we resolve now to establish these intentions and act from them? That may be the only resolution we need.

May you be filled with the peace and happiness that grow from your ground of wise intention.

It has been cold and snowing in New York! And it feels appropriate in this season, which we often describe as the time to be “jolly.” Yet, there are many people who feel the sting of inequity and poverty in the world, even more at these times of year, when the hustle and bustle of consumerism is annually at its peak. One sixth of the world still experiences hunger every day. Need is great everywhere, including in our own communities.

In this season of giving, can we contribute generously to those who are in need, and be generous and kind in every aspect of life? We can give of our time and money; we can embody patience, offer kindness in whatever way is appropriate, pay courtesy to every being–with a warm smile and glow of connection. As practitioners, we are ever mindful of our interconnectedness, that our happiness is interdependent with the happiness of all beings.

The Buddha famously said: “Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared,” and “If you knew what I knew about generosity, you would not let a meal go by without sharing.” What did the Buddha know? He knew that through generosity we learn to let go, opening to happiness and freedom.

May this season be full of light and love and your new year be safe, peaceful, healthy and easeful. May generosity grow ever more deeply in you.

 

The first instruction for establishing Mindfulness is to know the body, and it begins with focusing on breathing. Even though it’s an essential part of our life support system, we normally give very little attention to the breath, unless there is a problem with it.

As we focus on breath, we shift our primary identity away from dramas of the mind, into the substratum of life itself–everybody breathes.

The instruction is to know viscerally the quality of the simple sensations of in and out breaths. We allow breathing to follow its own nature, and simply see how it is. That flies in the face of our lifelong conditioning to control, direct and orchestrate everything. We learn the art of surrender, central to Dharma practice. Learning to allow the breath to unfold naturally, we grow able to surrender to other aspects of experience not within our control: we learn to let feelings be, let mind be. Gradually, we let whatever arises transform itself—“self liberate.”

Sometimes the breath is deep and smooth, profoundly relaxing the whole body; other times, so short and pinched, hurried and agitated, that the mind and body are restless and uncomfortable. As we practice, we realize breath is a psychic barometer on which awareness has an extremely powerful effect. We may see anger or worry arising; the heart pounds, the body grows tense; but if we can be with breath for a while—not suppressing emotions—everything can change. The mindful mind grows calm. As breath goes, so goes body. And body has a profound effect on mind. With our minds, we make the world. Attention to breath has tremendous consequences.

Isn’t it wonderful that this week we as a country pause to celebrate a holiday devoted to gratitude and giving thanks! We collectively agree to focus on the quality of mind that the Buddha cited as defining what it means to be civilized. In fact, he said it was rare to find in the world people who 1) are first to do a kindness, and 2) who are grateful and thankful for kindness done.

Usually, we equate gratitude with appreciation. We list all the things we are grateful for, animate and inanimate. Although this can be a wonderful practice, we can also realize the Buddha’s exhortation to understand gratitude as a response to kindness. This special kind of appreciation inspires us to cultivate in ourselves kindness that evokes gratitude.

Cultivating kindness and gratitude together, each needs the other to be genuine and heartfelt. Debts of gratitude apply to our benefactors who have acted with our wellbeing in mind, showing us the value of kindness and compassion in the process.

We respond by developing in ourselves qualities of generosity and discernment, becoming persons of integrity, who have learned from gratitude how to be harmless and unselfish in our dealings and to give help wherever needed, thoughtfully and respectfully. In this way, we deeply bow to goodness we have received and allowing its influence to ripple out beyond our small circles into the whole world. In deeply bowing, we express our gratitude by enlarging the circle of our benefactors’ goodness.

Deep bows of gratitude to you for your practice.

Our human life will never be without sorrows, struggles or difficulties. The Buddha called our mixed bag of sorrows, beauty, joy and great difficulties, the eight worldly winds: gain and loss, pleasure and pain, praise and blame, fame and disrepute. It is possible to discover Equanimity, the seventh factor of awakening, not apart from, but in the midst of these changing winds.

Equanimity is a most powerful capability in the unfoldment of spiritual life. It is the ability to trust one’s abiding capacity to meet circumstances with clarity, balance and a view that sees widely and deeply, without grasping the pleasant and without fear, reactivity to, resistance or resentment of the difficult.

This ability develops not through forcing or by will, but through the penetrating realization of the nature of being alive. We can trust in the possibility of transformation that comes through that great heart that sees beyond the personalization of the pain that takes it to be about “me” and “mine,” and sense that it is the shared experience to which we are all heir. The miracle of spiritual practice, it is said, is this change of heart.

Equanimity is not indifference or the setting up of distance from the difficulty so that it can be borne. It is not cold—it is warm hearted because it understands our conjoined humanity with compassion. His is the invitation of Dharma practice. We come closer to what is true and are more deeply embedded in and connected to life.

The fourth factor of Awakening is Piti—the third of the uplifting or energizing factors along with Investigation and Energy.

“Rapture” is the classic translation for Piti.  A closer translation may be deep aliveness and joyful interest. According to the texts, Piti fills the mind and body with lightness, agility and energy. Coarse and uncomfortable sensations are naturally replaced with soft and gentle, smooth and light sensations.   Mental and physical states are pervaded with an ineffable state of happiness and delightful satisfaction naturally resulting from steady practice; there is a gladness of the heart in uncovering and seeing clearly, bare truth.  Emily Dickinson famously expressed this understanding:  “To live is so startling, there is little time for anything else.”

What may be challenging is that awakening Rapture in our practice often requires that we look impersonally and directly at pain, moment to moment, without self-criticism or self-accusation. Through this process, we release resistance and unleash joy. But it does not come because we strategize to “get joy,” try to get rid of pain or grit our teeth and bear it to hopefully feel joy.  We understand pain as not “my pain,” but as universal. We are present with detachment, energetically investigating what is really there (moment to moment sensation and emotion, moving, shifting and changing) rather than what we conceptualize is there (unmoving solid sensation or emotion that is “me”). We bring curiosity to the dynamics of the mind and body, untangling ourselves from a fixed idea of stasis to find true aliveness.  Through allowing and knowing the flow of experience, piti appears.

Rapture, joy and aliveness are the natural, unforced fruit of your consistent and deep practice.  Practice now!